We got the call on Friday that Kansas had cleared us and we were legal to go home. That was such a weight off of our shoulders. Hotel (even extended stay) living with a newborn is less than ideal. Yet, I hadn't thought about the impact this news would have on B. When we told her, she left the room and didn't come back for quite a while. This was the strike of reality that she had been hoping would never come. She told me that she secretly wished that we would never be approved to leave Virginia. Yet, she knew that was unrealistic.
I started wondering if our open relationship was making this harder for her, and in some ways I think it is. If this were a closed or semi-open relationship, we would not have seen her several times over the last week. While this obviously prolonged the goodbye, I know it has to help too. She has seen Jayvan several times and she knows that we are taking wonderful care of this little boy.
So, today we are taking lunch over to their house and having our last goodbyes. I imagine there will be a lot of tears (probably mostly from me), but the pain is worth it.
May you feel the presence of all the mamas who have walked down this road present with you. Thinking of you and praying for all the parents involved! <3
ReplyDeleteHopefully it's far from the 'last' goodbye for you all - but it is still hard. I cried the ugly cry.
ReplyDeletethinking of you <3
ReplyDeleteThere are no words - only His comfort that will suffice and I'm praying for that...the only sure thing. Love!
ReplyDeleteWatching baby E's birth mom say goodbye to him is one of the most difficult things I've ever done. Sending you prayers for you and B.
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