The Countdown Chain

Lexi woke up yesterday and immediately asked, "When do we get to go get my brother and see the beach?"  So, we decided to start a countdown chain to make it more tangible for her.  The middle peak is the day we fly out to Virginia and the last one is the day we are hoping to fly home.  Of course, this little guy could throw us for a loop and our schedule could go out the window.  That's what babies are great at doing.

Why us?

This was a question that was floating around in my mind.  I just wonder what set us apart.  Out of all of the waiting families, why did e-mom choose us?  I asked her when we spoke with her yesterday.  She said, "You were simple and down-to-earth."  I  like to think that we are pretty down-to-earth.  She continued, "I looked at a lot of profiles that had all of these extreme vacations and they just seemed so over-the-top.  Your vacations were simple and family-oriented."  I told Matt that I was never more thankful for our Branson vacations and camping trips. 

I just find it so ironic and just another way that God proves that He works in the small things.  I remember looking at other PAP (potential adoptive parent) profiles and thinking, "We haven't been to the Great Wall of China or climbed the Mayan ruins.  What if e-moms think we won't be able to give this child an extravagant lifestyle?"  In the end, our family-friendly, relatively simple vacations are why we were chosen.  Thank you God.

Chat with E-mom!

We had the much-anticipated call with e-mom today.  E-dad ended up not being on the call.  Lissa (the birth parent specialist) was on the call with us to direct conversation if needed.  She basically only introduced us and said one other thing about something she would take care of (hospital details). 

Even though we completely understand that this is a hard time for e-mom, it was very hard for me to contain my excitement.  I acknowledged that I knew this was a hard time in her life, and I won't forget that even though we are excited.  She told us that she was really happy that we were so excited.  It would be weird if we weren't.

She wanted to know a bit more about the area we live in and we told her about our proximity to the city and the country.  We feel like we have the best of both worlds living in the suburbs.  She seemed to really like that.  We talked about our schools (which are awesome by the way).  She really wants this little boy to have a great education and so do we.

We asked her how she felt about us bringing our daughter with us and she was really excited about it.  It looks like we may be traveling before the baby is born to meet her and her family.  Exciting times are ahead of us!

Chat with our Adoptive Parent Specialist

We spoke with Laurie today.  She helped us think about how to handle the call with e-mom tomorrow.  I started with saying that during the call with e-mom I really wanted to just be myself, but I don't want to say the wrong thing.  Laurie reassured me that she thought we would have a great call if we were just ourselves and open and honest.  Whew! That is what I needed to hear.  I am an over-sharer in general but I can't imagine trying to hold back when I am talking to the woman who wants us to parent the baby she is carrying. 

She reassured us that it is OK to be excited, but we should also acknowledge that we understand how hard this time is for e-mom.  I can totally handle that.  I haven't really known how to manage my excitement at the possibility of having a new baby boy to cherish and love.  I also asked Laurie if it would be OK if I cried on the phone, because I'm also a crier.  She assured me that it would be OK and show that I'm real.  Well, good.  I'm a real over-sharing crier.  This should work out great!

Timeline Details

Thursday, June 16, 2011, 10:07 am:   Got a call from Lissa about a match!  She called my cell phone first and when I didn't answer, she called Matt's office.  Matt called my office and I answered the phone because my assistant was away from her desk.  He asked what I was doing and I replied, "Answering the phone because Jennifer is in the bathroom."

He then said, "I have the adoption agency on the line."  He could have led with that.

Lissa explained the situation to us including all of the medical and social forms she has about our e-mom and e-dad.  She said she would e-mail the documents to us and we could review them overnight and get back to her the next day.  She hung up and Matt told me he was taking off work early so we could review the documents at lunch.  In the mean time, I made a few phone calls (and no one answered!), saw a few patients, and told my best friend our exciting news!   I posted one of those vague facebook statuses that typically drive me crazy, but  I couldn't help myself.

 I'm pretty sure I won't be able to wipe the smile from my face for the rest of the day!

Lunch time:  Matt and I went to lunch and thought of a few questions we wanted to ask Lissa.  We called her from the car in the parking lot and she answered all of our questions.  We told her we most definitely want this baby!  She told us that we are more than welcome to sleep on it and call her in the morning.  We assured her that nothing would change overnight and we are matched!

We picked up Lexi from school and toured the infant room at her daycare.  We reserved a spot for our little boy.  It felt very surreal.  When we told Lexi that she was getting a baby brother in about a month, she said, "Cool."  Throughout the evening she started talking about all of the things she is going to teach her baby brother and the toys that she didn't really want to share (marbles and legos which typically aren't great for a baby anyway). ;)

I decided to post another facebook update:

It looks like we will be welcoming a baby boy into our hearts and home some time in July!

I am so overwhelmed by the outpouring of love and support we have received.  Our family is so incredibly blessed!

Friday, June 17, early morning:  Matt went to the grocery store to buy food for packed lunches and he was so discombobulated that he forgot half of the things he went there to get.  He was chaperoning a field trip for Lexi's class and I had to work.

Mid-Morning:  I got a call from the social worker with Datz Foundation in Virginia.  If the e-mom is out of state, our agency partners with a local agency to work with the e-mom.  We have to sign an agreement with that agency as well, but all fees are paid by our agency (from the money we pay them).  The social worker e-mailed the document and I printed it off.

 After I got off of work, I perused a new baby store that just opened this week, but I refrained from buying anything (amazingly).

1:00ish:  We met up at our bank and signed our match agreement in front of a notary.  We also set up the wire transfer to the agency.  The bank told us that it may not go out until the next business day.  That's fine as long as it gets there within 48 business hours of our signing the match agreement.  We drove down to the agency and dropped off the match agreement and they scanned and e-mailed our agreement with the Datz Foundation.

We went to Target because I just had to buy a couple things.  I finally caved and bought the Aden & Anais swaddling blankets that I've been eyeing.  Matt scoffed at the price, but I really wanted them.  I also bought a few little boy things that were on clearance.

Today, June 18th:  I started the morning with packing away all of the pink that I had out in the baby closet.  I took inventory of what we have and I tried to decide if I need to buy some newborn sizes.  I discovered that we have no boy bibs at all and I would really like to have a few overnight gowns (I love them for overnight diaper changes).

Tonight:  Matt and I are celebrating our ten-year wedding anniversary (which actually was June 8) and Lexi is going to spend the night at Nana's.  This may be one of the last nights that we have alone in a long time.  We plan to enjoy it.

Monday, June 20, 1:00pm:  We are scheduled to talk to our adoptive parent specialist (Laurie).  Laurie will advise us about how to handle the call with e-mom.  This seems to be a protocol that the agency has.  We have to talk to Laurie before we can talk to e-mom.

Tuesday, June 21, 11:00am:  THE conference call with e-mom! I can't wait for this call.  Lissa told us that e-mom can't wait for us to be involved and I can't wait to get to know her and her hopes and dreams for this baby boy.

After Tuesday, we'll know more about what the future holds.  E-mom has a doctor's appointment on Monday and that should give us a bit more information about the due date.  It has changed a few times (which happens in any pregnancy), but we should expect this little guy sometime in July.

55 Days

That is how long we were a waiting family.  We got the call this morning that an expectant mom picked us.  We are so excited.  It feels like such an amazing blessing.  It's almost surreal.

We do know a lot of details and yet there is so much we don't know.  We won't be able to talk to the e-mom until Tuesday and that seems like a very long time.

I saw this at Target today and snapped a picture:

Lexi is already excitedly talking about all of the things she is going to teach her little brother.